It was me, the whole time
by Ixi
Summary: Jack finds the clue of Mirriam's disappearance, he rushes to the Hannibal's office to find him there having session with Will.


It was Sunday. It was quite cold outside so the most of Baltimore population decided to stay at home. Not Jack Crawford. Jack Crawford had a new hobby.

It took two years for the Chesapeake Ripper to emerge from his dormant sleep and begin to taunt Jack with the death of Miriam Lass. And - of course – Jack didn't like it, at all. Actually his blood began to boil every time he remembered those phone calls, the fact that the Ripper was at his home in his bed and the note lying next to the hand.

Back then, when Mirriam disappeared, they were looking for anything. Any lead, she might have explored, any evidence she might have stumbled upon, but they found nothing conclusive. After a couple of woeful weeks they gave up.

But now Jack was back on the case. In his leisure time. It was actually helping him to forget about other things, especially the fact that his wife is dying. She didn't spend so much time with him as he wanted to. So he engrossed himself in the Miriam Lass' disappearance.

He knew that the Chesapeake Ripper is smart and in most likelihood destroyed the evidence which had brought Miriam to him. But it was very little known what was Miriam doing that day, where did she go, to whom she was talking to. Jack was not a patient man. He liked to have his answers and problems solved quickly, but he forced himself to be fastidious, to examine, analyze, think and develop. He didn't involve other people as he didn't want them to think that he is obsessed.

Most his efforts targeted to people who might have any connection to Jeremy Olmstead, the man that the Ripper transformed into the Wound Man. Today's visits were not an exception. All of them brought nothing and Jack sighed as he rang the doorbell in another house. One of the old teachers of Olmstead was living here. It was quite a long and bad shot, but the good ones had been explored two years ago.

A very old man open the door.

„Good evening, my name is Jack Crawford, FBI, may I come in?" he said showed his badge to Edward Zwick.

The man looked surprised – and certainly not in the form to commit murders these days, Jacked remarked to himself – and invited him in.

After a couple of necessary courtesies they sat down in the kitchen and Jack asked if he was by any chance visited two years ago by a young woman from FBI.

„Yes, I was." said Mr. Zwick and the Jack's heart almost stop. „She asked me a couple of questions about a former student of mine, Jeremy. But unfortunately I wasn't able to helped her. It was quite interesting, I don't get many visits from young pretty girls nowadays."

„Do you remember when she was here?" Jack managed.

„You mean the exact day? No." Mr. Zwick smiled.

„What did she asked you about?"

„She found somewhere that Jeremy attacked one of his schoolmates and wanted to hear details. I told her that I don't remember and the brawls between boys there were not anything unusual. You never found out the man who killed Jeremy, is that right?" asked the old man.

„No, we are still looking for him." answered Crawford. He didn't mention that his killer is responsible for the that of that 'pretty girl' as well. „Did she tell you where she was heading next?"

„I'm afraid I don't remember." Mr. Zwick answered and Jack sighed. As he was preparing the next question, his companion said: „I think I called a taxi for her, so maybe they can help you."

Jack Crawford smiled. It was a very hungry smile.

Deborah Scott was a nice woman and she definitely didn't deserve what was about to come to her. There were not many people in the building of the taxi service on Sunday and it was her bad luck that Jack spotted her first. He almost ambushed her with his FBI badge, intimidation posture, uncompromising voice and the urgent need to see the records.

Deborah really tried to resist and tell him that she can't just give him any information without warrant, but after a couple of minutes of his increased voice telling her that she will be responsible for people lives and a butload of other things, she gave up and with almost tears in her eyes looked up what he wanted.

With his breath held he looked at the records of the week when Miriam disappeared and a taxi was called to Mr. Zwick house. The taxi service stored also the anonymous data about the passengers.

_Here_. A taxi transporting a young woman in the day she disappeared. The address to which she was taken to was...

He blinked.

And then again.

And then again.

As he was driving there, he almost caused two traffic accidents. It was the address which he visited a couple of months ago to get help for Will Graham, the address which he visited to confess his feelings about losing Miriam Lass, the address his wife attended regularly to get peace with her illness. It was dr. Lecter's office.

A little more stronger grip and his steering wheel would be crashed into pieces. Could this be a coincidence? Could this be just another of Miriam's peaceful visits? But if, then why he would not say anything? Doctor Lecter was certainly not the type to forget something like that. Dammit that guy did not forget anything. If he was asked what he remembered first he would answer 'there was a bright light and then somebody hit me'.

Could it be him? Could the man he put so much trust in be the monster he has been trying to slay for years? Could he brutally murder people at night and then pretend to help the FBI during the day?

_Would you care to help us catch the Ripper?_

_How could I refuse._

By the time he reached the office it was dark outside and he was so angry that he could kill the doctor with bare hands. But it was Sunday night and the psychiatrist is was home. Jack had no plans of confronting him. He wanted to search the office and in case he finds something interesting to search it again with a warrant to find it officially.

He stopped at front door and looked around. Nobody on the street. He will have to pick the lock. However he tried the handle and to his surprise, it was open. _Working late, doctor? _Jack pulled out the gun. The idea of doctor Lecter being the killer again flooded his mind. Without much thinking he stepped inside the waiting room and moment after threw the door open.

He found doctor Lecter and Will Graham sitting in the opposite armchairs.

„Jack?" said Will surprised. Was that another gruesome murder? And what the gun is supposed to mean? Jack didn't point with the gun and let the hand with it alongside the body. But he was obviously prepared to use it if he wanted to.

Doctor Lecter was looking this unannounced visit into the eyes and tried to appear surprised and innocent. Could Jack find anything? His scalpel was lying on the desk a couple of metres away. „Jack, what happened?"

„Miriam Lass." he replied and tried to control his voice.

„Your trainee." said doctor slowly.

„She was here. Two years ago the day she disappeared. She took a cab here, to your office, to visit you. Care to explain?" Jack looked like a bull. That was the sight of the bull right before he attacks and you die.

„I am afraid I don't know what are you talking about. But I can look into my records." said the doctor with a fake concern.

„Where do you have them?"

„Upstairs."

Jack nodded.

Doctor slowly stand up and approached the ladder. He was very aware of the tense in Jack's body and the fact that he is of the verge of snapping. Overpowering both Jack and Will could be difficult. Playing the innocent will be safer.

Will watched the Good Doctor climbed a ladder, laughed a little and looked at Jack. „Really? You really suspect him to be the Chesapeake Ripper?"

Jack obviously didn't find this amusing. „I want my answers." His eyes didn't leave the doctor for the whole time.

_You always do_. Will sit back against the armchair. There were too many arguments he wanted to shout at Jack supporting that this cannot be true. Before he chose with which we would start, Hannibal was back.

He was holding a A4 size black elegant notebook.

„Put it on the table and step away from it." said Jack.

Doctor obliged silently and Will had to laugh again. Then their eyes met. Hannibal faked worried expression and Will said: „I am sure it will be explained." to reassure his friend. Hannibal nodded with a warm smile.

In meantime Jack found the date he was looking for. „In the time of Miriam's visit you had a session with Steven Rosenblum?"

Hannibal nodded. „Steven Rosenblum is a patient of mine for many years, he suffers from agoraphobia amongst the rest, he does not go outside and I visit him at his home five blocks away. I'm afraid I was not here when Miriam came." His eyes met a stern gaze.

Jack looked again at the notebook. It did not look as though the pages was missing, but he was sure that the Ripper would go through rewriting the whole book if it was necessary as he was a smart bastard.

Which was precisely what doctor did. It took him two evenings.

„I will need to search your office and house." said Jack with the same expression.

Doctor nodded again. „I'll provide you any help you need. The sooner you let this worries go, the better." He had everything prepared to leave, nobody will ever find him again.

„I will arrange it to tomorrow. And I will take you into custody until then." he continued.

Well, this can be a problem. Especially if the clouds of friendship leave Will's brain and he starts thinking objectively again. „All right, if that is really necessary, but I will need to call the patients coming tomorrow. There is six of them, five if I won't count your wife and you'll tell her."

That was it. The final impulse. The Jack's fist came quickly and hit Hannibal in the face. He forced himself not to block the strike and fell on the floor. Perfect. Now his lawyer can get him out of the prison in less than five minutes.

His lip was bleeding and he made a mental remark to cause Jack a nip of pain before he leaves. He did not plan to kill him, to send him treasure maps to remains of Miriam Lass' remains actually leading nowhere will be much more fun. Maybe to the remains of Will too? Hmm. He was not sure what about to do with the mongoose.

Before he even managed to lift his head in a painful manner pretending to be frightened and taken aback – oh god this playing innocent was almost more exhausting than the fight with Tobias Budge – Will jumped up of his seat.

„What the hell are you doing?!"

„Will, listen-"

„NO! You listen! This is not the Chesapeake Ripper. Chesapeake Ripper is a sadist. This is the man which keeps me on the good side of mental stability, this is the man I go to after I have horrible nightmares because of what you put me through and this is the man which listens to me and soothes me. This is my friend. Actually my only real friend! And I understand that the idea of him being the Ripper pisses you off, because he is actually part of the investigation – but it was you who pull him in it. And I understand that you don't want the Ripper to be the one of the pillars of your wife. And he is not. I know the mind of the Ripper." He took a step closer. „He would have killed me a long ago. This is the man who helps, who saved Abigail Hobbs – I would not be able to do that – and who saved the guy in the ambulance. Your investigation can ruin his reputation and practice, and what do you do – you punch him!"

This was like a cold shower. Jack has never seen Will Graham so angry – and so in control. He took a deep breath. Will Graham was right. Jack slipped his gun back by his belt and offered a hand to Hannibal still lying on the ground. „I am sorry, doctor."

Hannibal accepted the hand and was pulled up and nodded.

Will spoke again. „You won't take him into prison." Jack opened his mouth to speak, but Will continued. „I'll watch him tonight. Tomorrow you can search the properties and speak to the guy with agoraphobia. Beside of that you'll need to contact all taxi services in the town to find out where she headed next."

Jack closed his mouth. „All right." He looked at the doctor who was holding his handkerchief on his lip. „We'll come to your office and house in the morning. Call your patients including my wife and think something up." He turned around to leave.

„Jack." stopped him Hannibal.

„Yes?" he turned around again.

„Wait. I'll give you a spare key of the front door of the office. I'll be at home waiting." he approached his desk and got the key from the drawer. He did not glance the scalpel.

He stretched the arm and Jack took the key. „Thank you."

Then Jack left.

„Thank you, Will." doctor said as the turned to him. „I really appreciate it. I'll call my patients and then we will go to my house and I cook you a dinner."

Will nodded. There was no point of traveling an hour with doctor to Wolf Trap when Jack will came in the morning.

„Do you have a guest room?"

„I do."

Will was sitting in the dining room in the doctor's house and enjoying the meal. It was divine. As always. The wine was delicious too. He took a sip.

„I would like to thank you again for defending me." said Hannibal as he was cutting through his steak.

„I really meant it. About you being my only real friend – if I don't count my dogs. For Jack the murders will always be more important and Alana pities me too much." He said without the eye contact.

„Didn't you think about the possibility of me being the killer – at least for the second?" said Hannibal softly.

Will laughed. „No, not really. Even though you have some common characteristics."

„Really? Tell me."

„Well, you were a surgeon, so you have a great anatomical knowledge. You are meticulous and careful. I saw your drawings, you're an artist. The Chesapeake Ripper is too, in his own way." Will looked up from the food hoping that he didn't offend his friend, but only to find a sincere smile.

„More wine?"

„Yes please."

„What would I do with the organs?" asked Hannibal as he was coming to Will with the wine.

„Sell them and paid for your suits?" Will laughed.

„Really?"

„No. The Chesapeake Ripper is not like that. He would do something... " Will sighed and cut off another piece of his steak, „something gruesome and horrible and still perfect and elegant and mocking." He didn't watch as Hannibal poured wine into his glass. „If it was you, you would..." he put the meat in his mouth, chewed and swallowed and as the meat was halfway through, his hand with fork stopped in the air and his pupils dilated as the thought hit him. He looked at his hand still in the air, it was trembling. „No..." he managed and felt the blade pressed against his neck.

„Yes."

The blade was just pressed and not hurting – for now. He felt Hannibal's other hand reaching for his mobile phone and then for his gun. Then the blade went away and he watched Hannibal silently return to his seat. He put the gun next to his plate and continued eating.

He looked in his eyes. And now he saw it. The predator behind. Lurking, waiting, devouring. His brain was now overwhelmed with too many feelings. He didn't know whether he should shout, cry, vomit or laugh. His body gave in and he began to hysterically laugh.

„All the time... you... all the food... you..."

„Yes."

„I defended you and persuaded Jack not to arrest you!"

„Yes."

Will took his wine and drink it all. „Will you kill me now?"

That was an excellent question and Hannibal spent the whole evening thinking about it. There were so many ways he could kill Will and be thrilled by it. It could be his final killing as the Chesapeake Ripper before he disappears, his masterpiece.

„No."

„No?"

„No."

„Why not?"

Hannibal smiled and took a sip of wine. „I would like you to be my friend."

„You would what?!"

„I find you very interesting Will. I didn't kill you because of that and because I wanted you to become my friend. I decided to hold on that."

„How do you even imagine it?! Brainwashing me into killing with you or me being locked in a cellar as your pet?" He did not like eye contact but now he was staring.

Hannibal stand up and took the gun. He came to Will, put the gun to his temple and whispered to his ear: „Which one would you like?"

Will's spine was so taken over by fear that it took him a while to realize that a needle was just injected into his neck.

Jack Crawford was sleeping. It took him while to fall asleep as the events of the day was still in front of his eyes. He wasn't sure whether of what he has done was right or wrong. Maybe he was to brute to doctor and maybe he should have taken him into custody.

He was woken up by his cell. He sighed and looked at it. It was a message from Will Graham. Suddenly he was very much woken up and read it: „Check your e-mail."

His wife didn't pay attention as he got up quietly because she was used to it. He strode to the living room still in the dark to turn the computer on when two strong hands grabbed him. Before he could react a needle was injected into him.

Jack Crawford woke up again. He was still in his pyjama, but now he was tightly bound to the chair. He opened his eyes and saw a surgical table in front of him. On the table was lying Will Graham. Jack gasped. He watched Will's chest and found out that Will is still breathing. He looked at him one more minute before he broke the gaze and started to look around.

He turned the head to the left and froze. There he was. Hannibal Lecter sitting in a quite comfortable chair with a cruel smile on his lips. He was wearing only white shirt and black trousers. On the small table right next to him were knives and surgical instruments.

„You." was all Jack could say.

„I didn't want to leave without a goodbye." said Hannibal. All warmth in his voice was gone. This was ice, brutal and unmerciful. But still playful and satisfied with himself.

„Where's my wife?"

„Still sleeping in your bed. I did not lie when I said I find the world a better place with her in it."

Jack took a deep breath. „You must have enjoyed the hunt for you."

„I did. Very educational." still the same predator smile.

„What did you do with Miriam Lass?"

„You have one pony alive and still care about the lost one?" Hannibal did glance over to Will. Jack shuddered. Hannibal continued. „You shouldn't have sent her to me."

It took him a while to answer: „No, I shouldn't."

„However, she was delicious." Jack frowned. „As you said. It's good that the meat endures so long in the freezer."

Jack's eyes widened in horror. „You fed her to me?!"

„Not only her."

Jack tilt his head back. This must be a nightmare his brain presents him after that day.

„I think a sip of water would be helpful." said Hannibal, stand up and bring the glass of water to Jack. He swallowed the first sip but spit out the second on Hannibal aiming at his face. He mostly missed.

The predator in Hannibal's eyes shined. „That was rude, and I believe I owe you something." with that words the doctor hit him in the face.

It felt like a hammer hit him. Jack never though about what muscles doctor hides under his three piece suits. Maybe he should have.

Jack shaked his head and then watched as Hannibal slowly came to the table with all the sharp things and took a scalpel into his hands. He wanted too look strong but caught himself staring in horror. Hannibal obviously caught him too. „Now." he said, „I want you to tell me the truth about Will."

„What truth?"

„The truth. How far would you push him. Would you push him so far to break him to catch me, or other killers? And speak the truth, otherwise you will be punished. That is my first and only warning."

Jack looked into his eyes and saw only menace. „I would push him and I would break him if that's what it took to get you or other killer."

Hannibal nodded. „Good boy."

„Now you will kill me?"

„Now I will give you the choice." he came next to Will's head.

„Only one of you will leave this room alive. The other one will be tortured to the death for months. The choice is yours."

„You want me to choose between my torture and his?"

„Yes."

„Why?"

„I am a cruel and brutal sociopath, or at least your appraisal says so." Hannibal licked his lips.

Jack was trembling. „Him." said quietly.

Hannibal approached him. „Loud and in the sentences please, I'll make you say it until I am satisfied with it. What do you want to happen to Will?"

Jack understood this cruel game. The psychopath wanted him to say it so he would feel guilty the rest of his life. „I... I want Will to be tortured to death for months. I want him to suffer and be in pain." He looked Hannibal in the eyes. Still same smile on his lips.

„Yes, I think this will do." Suddenly, in a swift moment he grabbed his head by jaw, locked it tightly and lowered his head to look into his eyes. His other hand took out a small voice recorder from his pocket and played the last statement Jack had made.

„I want you to know, that I will take my time with Will. I will guide him through the tortures devices of middle ages and construct some new for him. And every time he begs me to stop and kill him, I'll play him this. I'll tell him that all of what is happening is because of you."

Tears were running from Jack's eyes. Hannibal then injected another needle into his neck.

Hannibal was satisfied. This should cloud Jack's judgment enough. He would not want a completely sane person in the head of the behavioural science, when he is a fugitive. But to be sure he'll send this message to all his colleagues and Freddie Lounds.

Will Graham woke up. The world was rocking. He took a couple of deep breaths before he sat up only to find out that the world is indeed rocking. He must be on a boat. He looked around and found out that this is not a type of boat he is used to. This is quite a luxury one. _Of course._

He noticed that his clothes are completely changed including his underwear. His faced is also shaved and his nails are clipped. What the hell?

He drinks from a glass with water prepared on the nightstand. He looks around for something of a weapon, but then dismisses the thought. Hannibal surely counts with everything.

He stands up and walks outside to the bow. There he finds two deckchairs. One of them occupied with Hannibal in white plain shirt and beige cotton trousers. Bare feet. He is reading Two Years' Vacation by Jules Verne. Will is surprised, that is certainly not the literature he had expected.

„Hello, Will." Hannibal carefully closes the book and put it beside him.

Will doesn't know what to do. Finally he sits into the second deckchair. „Where are we?"

„In Caribbean sea."

Will nods. Not what he expected but better than a cellar. He looks around and notices an ice box with beer. He looks at Hannibal – beer, really?

„Please." Hannibal gives him approval, no need to tell Will that the beer is actually people.

Will sips the beer and sighs. „So what are your plans with me?"

„I told you. I want you to be my friend."

„You didn't told me how you want it to work."

„You will simply be by my side. We will have conversations and we will enjoy life."

„So you want me not to think about your murdering people at nights?"

„If it helps, I choose rude people."

„It does not help, really."

„Will, I won't lie to you. I am what I am. I won't stop these activities. If you won't give in or you will stop amusing me I may simply throw you overboard, or make a dinner out of you."

„That's reassuring."

„That's the truth."

„Tell me, except for choosing this or death, why should I agree?"

„You will be happy."

„I was happy before you kidnapped me."

„No, you were not. You were miserable with a life full of nightmares. I can make them stop. You decided to sacrifice yourself for the uncle Jack to be happy. That would continue, until he would break you."

„He would not do that."

Hannibal put out the machine and hit a button: _I would push him and I would break him if that's what it took to get you or other killer._

Will heard Jack's voice and took another sip. Then sighed again. „What about my dogs?"

„I left Alana a message to take care about them. She will find them a proper home and I'm sure she will keep at least one of them so it would remind you to her."

„So what now?"

„We are heading to Europe, but we will not rush there. We will take a trip around the world. I will teach you some things, such as French, Italian and history. And we will take care about your nightmares."

Will took another sip. They are on the sea. Hannibal cannot kill anybody here. And it will take some time before they actually meet somebody rude Hannibal could eat. He does not have to decide _now_. „Okay."

Hannibal Lecter smiled.

The End.

* * *

It's been for more than a year since I wrote a Hannibal fanfiction! :-) But couldn't get this out of my mind, so I wrote it down. I totally blame Brian Fuller and the tumblr for the thought that Hannibal wants Will as his friend. It is only your fault :-).

I need a beta to correct and polish it, but I have none. Sorry about mistakes.

I have a great respect for Jack Crawford, but I don't like him. I don't like him for ten years and in my Hannibal/Clarice fanfictions he was always the bad guy. That is not going to change :-).

ixilecter on Tumblr


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